*i was upset!!..almost moved me to tears!...
*How can I be replaced without even notified?....how can my place be given to another without a notice?....NOT A WORD!..*
I felt disappointed....and let down!...
I thought I was coming back to continue my function! I wasn't taking it well....
How could I just have been replaced just like that without even been told?
Everything inside of wanted to React!!!
I love my work!..... i had grown so attached to it that it had become a part of me....i felt like a bear rubbed off her cubs!!...i was dazed....in shock!!!
For me, I always put my love on what I do..that way I enjoy doing what I do because I have put my love in it...
Taking it away from me and giving it to another person without telling me left me little or no chance to be prepared for the shock!!!
I also felt the pang of jealousy at the same time...
So all my labour is gonna be handed over to someone who wasn't even there to offer an inkling of help at any time???
I wasn't just upset that someone else was taking over my job...i was really ticked off by the fact that I wasn't even deemed worthy enough to be told before hand...i had to hear from the mouth of another!! WoW!!!....just wow!!!
The kids are used to me!!!....i have come to love them like my own!....why??...why can't they wait for me to be back??...or at least why couldn't i be even told and consulted????
I was already getting weighed down. Several thoughts were coming at me like a force of pouring rain!!!....i had to help my mind....
Stop it! Don't think that? Seraph calm down!!!..dont think like that....STOOOOP!...BELIEVE THE BEST!!!
BELIEVE THE BEST OF WHAT???...
I began to pray quietly under my voice...i wouldn't let this ruin my evening....i would let this take my joy....i took a deep breathe....and said
*Lord!! Pls give me the strength of character to respond well to this!!...give the strength not to react...give me the understanding to pull through this one and respond the way you want!!!.....
I had to battle my mind to quietness the rest of the night....and not just think about it!!!.....i had been disappointed!!!
I didn't know when I slept but I knew I lingered and lingered in bed this morning.....i didn't wanna get out of bed.....GYM!!!...but I have to be at the gym......so I began to push for my day to commence.....
.......count it all joy......i heard my mind say that!
JAMES1:2 began to pop up in my mind!!!
I know that scripture!!!...i just began to recite it to myself!!!!
*Count it all joy when you fall into diverse temptation,knowing the testing of your faith produces patience......
This calmed me as I prepared for gym.I chanted it all the way there.refusing to yield to all the crazy thoughts that was popping up...even though they were very tempting......i know they would only drive me to the brink of cranky, anger and disappointment.h....i wanted my joy and peace intact.....i can't suffer the set back that the lack of those two brings....i couldn't afford the price tag of beginning my day with the events of last night.....
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